A date with your enemy
by AcornpounceQueenOfDeKitties
Summary: Blackstar has a dating show and not the normal kind of dating show. a date with your enemy is what it's called he is taking cats that you've reviewed and is sending them on dates, why is he doing this? cause he can! please read! and I suck at summaries
1. Spottedleaf and Sandstorm

**EPISODE 1**

"Welcome to a date with your enemy! Basically, it's the name, we figure out who your enemy is and make you go on a date!" says Blackstar sitting in a feather nest in front of a camera.

"Today the couple will be… Spottedleaf and her enemy!" he said as Spottedleaf padded up to him.

"hi! " she said smiling and sat down beside the host.

"Hi, now I've got a few questions," he said, Spottedleaf nodded.

"So who's your enemy?" he asked.

"Firestar," Spottedleaf said winking at the camera cat.

"Uh no that's your crush, your enemy is Sandstorm or Clawface that's his name right?" Blackstar said rolling his eyes.

"Um, okay I would prefer to go on a date with my killer than Sandstorm!" Spottedleaf said gagging at the she-cats name.

"Okay Sandstorm it is!" he said brightly.

"What?! Nooooooo!" Spottedleaf moaned, Blackstar smirked and produced his phone and called Sandstorm.

"Hi Sandstorm we need you over here."

"Where?"

"My den."

"Is it dirty?"

"What?"

"Last time I and Firestar came over your den was a mess!"

"Oh, no my den is not dirty, and you're on speaker phone."

"Okay, I'll be there in a sec."

Sandstorm hangup and a second later walked into Blackstars den.

"You wanted to.. WHY IS SHE HERE!?" Sandstorm snarled glaring at Spottedleaf.

"Welcome to my new show a date with your enemy." Blackstar purred.

"Oh no! Am I dating HER?!" she asked grimacing, Blackstar nodded.

"Where will we be going?" Spottedleaf asked tartly.

"You'll be going to the fancy feast the restaurant," Blackstar said than quickly added.

"I won't be paying." he pushed the two out of his den and into Sandstorms car.

"Bye!" he said waving, Sandstorm sat in the driver's seat and Spottedleaf in the passengers. Sandstorm turned on the radio.

"oOOOo little mouse!" Sandstorm sang along, Spottedleaf leaned forward to change the channel, Sandstorm chomped down hard on Spottedleaf's paw.

"OOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!" she screamed, "you bit me!"

"Um, we do that in battle all the time!"

"I'm a MEDICINE CAT!" she yowled, Sandstorm rolled her eyes and turned the music up.

"IF YOU WANNA EAT THE MOUSE OKAY"

"I hate this song." Spottedleaf moaned, Sandstorm sneered and turned it up even more.

"Oo, this place looks nice," Spottedleaf said as they walked into fancy feasts the restaurant.

"Your table is right here." says a she-cat padding up to them and gesturing to a table for two.

"Thanks." Sandstorm muttered and sat down, she grabbed a menu and hid her face.

"What are you doing?" Spottedleaf asked reaching for her own menu.

"I can't be seen with you!" Sandstorm hissed glancing around to make sure no one she knew was there.

"Right," Spottedleaf muttered. The two sat in silence, that was later broken by the ring of Sandstorms phone.

"Hello?"

"It's Firestar."

"Oh hi, honey!"

"Yes, where are you? we were supposed to have a date tonight."

"Sorry, how about tomorrow?"

"Um… tomorrow? I've got plans."

"With who?"

"Hahaha, bye honey."

Firestar hangup on her, her gaze shot up to glare at Spottedleaf.

"He has plans… what are you doing tomorrow?" Sandstorm asked in a snarl. Spottedleaf smiled weakly.

"HE LOVES ME MORE!" she shrieked after a moment of silence, Sandstorm gasped and smacked Spottedleaf on the head with her menu, hard.

"YOU CAN'T HURT ME! I'M A MEDICINE CAT!" she howled shielding her head with her own. From the side stood two waiters, the waitress pushed the waiter forward to go take the two angry she-cats order.

"Uh, have you decided your order?" he asked, Sandstorm froze, she was about to hit Spottedleaf again.

"Uh yes, I would like to have barbecue mice with chili sauce and sour cream!" Sandstorm ordered looking at her menu.

"THAT'S MY FAVOURITE!" Spottedleaf shrieked, totally pissed because there is no way she could have the same meal as Sandstorm.

"Stop screaming!" Sandstorm hissed looking around to make sure no-one was looking.

"Sorry," Spottedleaf hissed and looked at her menu, "I would like a Fancy feast burger with fries," she said, the waiter nodded and rushed back to the waitress who pushed him back.

"Any drinks?" he asked sighing and pulling out his pad.

"Milk," Spottedleaf replied, Sandstorm thought for a bit.

"Twoleg blood," she said licking her lips.

"Great choice!" the cat waiter replied and darted off.

"BACK TO THE BATTLE!" Sandstorm yowled smashing her menu into Spottedleaf's snout. It broke, "oops," she whispered and tried to put it back together. She gave up, threw it aside and stole Spottedleaf's.

"OI!" she hissed reaching to snatch it back, Sandstorm stuck out a paw and Spottedleaf's short arms couldn't reach.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!"

Sandstrom glanced around.

"Who screamed?" she asked, a waiter padded up to her.

"The twoleg in the basement, here is your milk, and here is your blood," he said handing them there drinks.

"Thanks," Spottedleaf muttered and sipped her milk. Sandstorm slurped her blood.

"Your meals," another waiter said placing the meals in front of them, Sandstorm grabbed her meal and ate.

"Gross don't eat so fast!" Spottedleaf hissed in disgust, Sandstorm smiled.

"But the faster we finish the faster we can leave!" she hissed with a grin, Spottedleaf smiled and began shoving the food into her mouth. The cats that sat on the closest table moved away.

"DONE!" they shouted at the same time and got up to leave, a waitress blocked there path.

"Don't forget to pay!" she said smiling and pushing them to the cash register. Sandstorm swiped her card and gawped.

"THREE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY BUCKS!" she screamed and shock as she paid, "you owe me," she said to Spottedleaf, she nodded.

"I didn't know this place was so CHEAP!" Spottedleaf squealed, "I'm going here more often!" she said prancing out of the door.

It was a silent trip home, they stopped at Blackstar's.

"So how did it go?" he asked greeting them, they glared at him.

"Just so you know your plan didn't work, we're still enemies," Spottedleaf said, Blackstar frowned.

"That wasn't the plan, it was to annoy you," Blackstar said, Sandstorm looked like she was going to throttle him, she restrained herself and ended up just punching him.

 **I hope you enjoyed this, please request sets of enemies to go on dates =D**


	2. Ashfur and Bramblestar

**the queue!**

 **Acornpounce and enemy #3**

 **Yellowfang and Brokenstar #4**

 **Cinderpelt and monster #5**

 **Firestar and Tigerstar #6**

 **Breezepelt and Lionblaze #7**

 **Bluestar and Thistleclaw #8**

* * *

Blackstar smiled warmly at Ashfur.

"I'd like to know, who is your enemy?" Blackstar asked Ashfur thought for a bit.

"Bramblestar," he said confidently.

"well, I have a gift for you!" Blackstar said and pulled a curtain aside to reveal, BRAMBLESTAR! Ashfur squealed in delight.

"OH! thank you Blackstar!" he said and hugged the old Shadowclan leader, Blackstar frowned.

"you really don't know why you're here," he said, Ashfur looked confused.

"you brought Bramblestar to me so I could beat him up!" he said slightly too happy.

"Kind of," Blackstar said wondering how to tell Ashfur without getting killed.

"WHAT!" Bramblestar said in fear, Blackstar smiled at Bramblestar.

"tell Ashfur why you're here!" he said slyly and slunk out of the room, he would return once Ashfur calmed down, Bramblestar watched Blackstar go with puppy eyes, Blackstar rushed away before he could be seduced. there was a lot of crashing and smashing sounds coming from the room, Blackstar warily padded back in after thirty minutes, Ashfur glared at him.

"where are we going?" he asked in a snarl, Blackstar backed closer to the door in case he needed to make a quick escape.

"the movies, you'll be watching paws," he said.

"I LOVE THE TRAILER!" Ashfur and Bramblestar said at the same time. Blackstar nodded and pushed the two quickly out of the den.

"cool, have a great time!" he said and chucked them some bus tickets and the movie tickets, Ashfur looked at the bus ticket.

"OH, NO! I hate the: for all clans bus!" him and Bramblestar said at the same time, they glared at each other. they sat at the bus stop in silence, well it was until Ferncloud and her army turned up.

"Oh, Hi Ashfur, kids stay back, he's a psycho," she hissed and pulled her youngest kits close.

"IT WAS A LONG TIME AGO!" Ashfur groaned, Ferncloud rolled her eyes and edged further away, Bramblestar sighed and took out his phone, the lock screen was Squirrelflight and their kits. Ashfur glanced at the phone.

"are those really her kits?" he asked menacingly, Bramblestar's eyes widened and he gulped, Ferncloud gasped. Bramblestar brought his phone to his ear.

"Squirrelflight, get the kids to the safe house," he said in a whisper before hanging up. Ferncloud nodded approvingly.

"this has got nothing to do with you!" Ashfur hissed just as the bus pulled up, Bramblestar grabbed Ashfur and pulled him aboard, Ferncloud followed, she and her army went to the back and Ashfur sat as far away as possible. The bus driver was Mosskit.

"um," Bramblestar muttered and leaned forward and prodded the kit on the shoulder, "do you have your license?" he asked, Mosskit rolled her eyes.

"How long do you think I've been in Starclan? I'm older than you!" she hissed annoyed, "everyone all ways askes that," she grumbled and glanced down, " Snowkit! put us in reverse!" she hissed and the car lurched backward and hit the bus stop.

"oops!" Snowkit mewed, Bramblestar frowned.

"Isn't he deaf?" he asked, Mosskit nodded.

"he used to be, he got his hearing when he died," she explained, "FORWARD!" she commanded and spun the wheel, the car hit a sign reading. 'crazy bus drivers are driving, drive carefully around buses'

"nonsense!" Mosskit hissed and drove along the wrong side of the road.

"this sucks!" Ashfur groaned Bramblestar nodded, he glanced down the ile and saw Rock.

"STAY STILL!" he hissed to Ashfur, "make sure he can't see you!" he added, Ashfur frowned and glanced around to see who Bramblestar was talking about. Rock saw him and waved, he got up and started towards him.

"Sorry!" he hissed to Bramblestar who was trying to hide under the seat.

"what are you doing Bramblestar?" Rock asked smiling down on Bramblestar even though he can't see, he just knows.

"I dropped a pen!" he said quickly and grabbed a pen that was lying around, Rock nodded.

"well can I join you," before they could say no the tom had squashed between them even though it was a two people seat.

"I hate you, "Ashfur said to Bramblestar randomly, Rock gasped.

"surely not!" he said, "It is wrong to hate!" he added and gasped again, "sorry I have to go poo!" how on a bus was soon explained he padded off pulled open a window and shoved his hind legs out the window. soon later came a scream.

Finally, the bus trip ended and Bramblestar and Ashfur ran out, they padded into the movie theater and handed in there tickets, the room was full and to there horror, Ferncloud, and her army sat right behind them, with a lot of popcorn and some with a white cough. the movie should have been great but the whole time it was coughing and munching, sometimes popcorn in the back of the head. when it was time to go home they realized Blackstar had given them a one-way bus ticket. just as they thought it couldn't get worse, it started to rain.

"I HATE BLACKSTAR!" Ashfur yowled in rage as they reached his house, they were drenched and sick of each other.

"Hello!" Blackstar said brightly standing under a shelter with a cup o hot chocolate. "I will be back with Acornpounce and her enemy!" he said smiling at the cameras, Ashfur glared at him.

"NOT IF YOU'RE DEAD!" he shouted and chased the tom into his house, Blackstar locked the door.

* * *

 **Okay, am I supposed to choose a warrior cat that I think of as an enemy? because that's what I'm going to do!**


	3. Acornpounce and enemy

"welcome to a date with your enemy!" Blackstar says, "with me is Acornpouce!" he says and smiles at the director of the show.

"why did I allow this!" she grumbles crossing her paws and scowling. Blackstar chuckled.

"so, out of all the warrior cats, who is your enemy?" he asked, Acornpounce frowned, she had a long list. Rainflower, Hollyleaf, Leafpool, Dovewing, and Berrynose

"Berrynose," Acornpounce hissed, Berrynose padded on the scene.

"ARGH! Berrynose! you were supposed to come when I said not Acornpounce!" Blackstar yowled smacking a paw to his forehead.

"well, I'm here!" Berrynose sniffed and checked his face in a hand mirror.

"you've got a zit there," Acornpounce said, Berrynose jumped.

"WHERE!" he screamed twisting his face in all angles. Acornpounce rolled her eyes.

"can we hurry up?!" she groaned at Blackstar, he shrugged.

"Okay, you and Berrynose will be going to the Ferncloud and her army circus!" he said throwing his hands in the air. silence greeted his words.

"Yay!" Acornpounce grumbled sarcastically. Blackstar sighed and booted the two out of his den.

"HAVE A HORRIBLE TIME!" he shouted after them, Berrynose sniffed.

"He should treat me better!" he hissed turning his gaze to Acornpounce, she huffed and padded over to Berrynoses car, she hopped into the passenger seat and put some headphones on. Berrynose got into the back seat, Acornpounce glanced at the driver's seat to see Daisy.

"I couldn't afford another car," she explained putting the car into gear. "so are you another one of Berrynoses Girlfriends?" she asked, Berrynose groaned.

"MUM! I told you this is a date with your enemy!" he shouted, Daisy frowned.

"don't shout at your mother!" she said tutting, through the mirror Acornpounce, spotted Hazeltail in the very back of the car.

"hi!" he said. Acornpounce waved. "So, how many shows do you direct?" he asked leaning forward.

"three," she answered. Hazeltail nodded. Daisy stopped the car.

"we're here!" she shouted, Berrynose and Acornpounce hop out of the car, Daisy and Hazletail follow.

"MUM!" Berrynose groaned, Daisy, huffed and lead HazelTail off to a tent. Berrynose sniffed and gulped.

"POPPYFROST!" he yowled and leaped behind Acornpounce.

"hi!" Poppyfrost mewed bounding over, Acornpounce smiled weakly and pushed Berrynose toward her.

"BERRYNOSE! why were you hiding?" she asked, Berrynose glanced at Acornpounce.

"uh..." he smiled at Poppyfrost, she gasped.

"are you two on a DATE!" she asked, Acornpounce shrugged.

"kind of..." She mewed, Berrynose shook his head.

"lies!" he hissed, "I was forced on a date because of this show!" he said, Poppyfrost sobbed.

"the same excuse when I caught you and Honeyfern back together!" she sobbed before running off. "you are a horrible boyfriend!" she shouted over her shoulder, Berrynose sighed. Acornpounce padded off to a tent. he bounded after her.

"she will never forgive me!" he groaned, Acornpounce nodded.

"who would?" she snorted and sat down on a chair and gazed off into the ring. Dustpelt padded in wearing a tailcoat after Dustpelt padded an embarrassed Spiderleg dressed up as a clown. After Spiderleg was the bouncing the kits wearing leotards, they did flips and crab walks and all the other stuff, after the kits Ferncloud padded in holding some hops to jump through.

"this sucks," Acornpounce grumbled crossing her paws. Berrynose gulped.

"Hey, do you think Poppyfrost would kill me if you know cause we won't be dating anymore if I date Honeyfern?" he asked, Acornpounce stared at him wide-eyed.

"this is why I hate you," she groaned and stared ahead into the ring, Daisy and Hazletail waddled over to them, pushing through the crowd and waving her paws, Berrynose hid his face from view and groaned.

"BERRY!" she shouted calling him over, as she did she tripped over another cat's paws, to catch herself her paws shot forward, one delved into the trippers popcorn. Daisy pushed herself back up and finally reached Berrynose and Acornpounce.

"here," she gasped and handed them all some tomatoes, she started chucking hers at Spiderleg, Acornpounce grinned and followed suit. By the end of the show, Spiderleg was completely red and the reason why Daisy had come was now clear. They stayed at the tent for a couple of hours.

"OH!" Daisy said checking her watch. "It is time we go home for dinner!" she said, even though they had been stuffing there faces with fried food. They made their way back to the car, as they did they saw paws smacking the window from the inside.

"MUM!" Mousewhisker moaned, "I'm hungry!" he moaned, Daisy gasped.

"you were in the car!" she shouted, "you must be hungry!" she said and hopped in the car, Acornpounce followed and they drove home, she and Berrynose were dropped off at Blackstar's.

"had a good time?" he sneered, Acornpounce nodded, Blackstar frowned, "Oh... well a date with your enemy will be back with mother and son, Yellowfang and Brokenstar!" he said to the camera before entering his den.


	4. Yellowfang and Brokenstar

Blackstar smiled at the camera, next to him sat Yellowfang and Brokenstar.

"this is weird," Brokenstar snarled, "we're family!" he added outraged, Yellowfang rolled her eyes.

"let's just hurry! I have my show to get to," she hissed checking her watch. Blackstar nodded.

"Welcome to A date with your enemy, today we have like promised, Yellowfang and Brokenstar!" he said to the camera, "and today they will have a romantic picnic watching the sunset," he added.

"am I the only one creeped out by this?" Brokenstar groaned and Yellowfang shook her head.

"no I am too, but I have a show to get to!" she said looking at her watch again.

"Yellowfang did the cooking cause I suck at cooking," Blackstar said ignoring the two, "now bye!" he said and shoved them out of his home and into Yellowfangs limo. within seconds they got to a field. The sun was just about to set.

"you went over the speed limit," Brokenstar muttered.

"come on!" Yellowfang hissed and yanked her son onto the picnic blanket that awaited them, on it was deliciously roasted mice, crunchy voles, Squirrel sundae, and berry pie shaped as a love heart.

"It looks delicious!" he said and sat down, the picnic rug was surrounded by rose petals.

"creepy," someone muttered from behind them who was walking their dog. Brokenstar sighed and blocked his ears.

"Um..." Yellowfang handed Brokenstar a crunchy vole, a spicy mouse burrito, a whole plate of twenty deliciously roasted mice, a squirrel sundae, an apple and a slice of berry pie.

"Thanks," he mewed and started stuffing his mouth with the delight, he had finally finished everything but the pie. his hand rested on his now huge belly.

"I was on a diet," he chuckled and tried to sit up but couldn't move. Yellowfang smiled down at him and handed him the berry pie, Brokenstar smiled and took it he was about to bite into it before pausing.

"what kind of berry?" he asked warily, Yellowfang sneered and punched the pie into her son's mouth, he chocked and grabbed his own throat he tried to hack the pie out but it was too late.

"HA HA! death berries" she shouted not knowing the cat who had said creepy earlier had stopped to watch and had seen the whole murder scene. Cinderpelt and Cinderheart hoped out of the limo boot and tackled the cat to the floor, Yellowfang grabbed Brokenstar's body and flung him into the car, the cinders ran after her and they quickly drove off. the cat who had been walking his dog sat up and glared at the camera.

"you just let them bet me up?!" he hissed, the camera cat quickly rushed off and Blackstar who had been watching the whole scene chuckled.

 _ **AN: Sorry this was such a short chapter :/ don't forget to review a cat and his or her enemy, it might take a while for them to appear but they will.**_


	5. Tigerstar and Firestar

**Next chapter**

 _Firestar and Tigerstar_

Tigerstar glared at Blackstar, "you are supposed to be loyal to me! how does making me go on a date with Firestar sound like being loyal?!" he hissed angrily. Blackstar sighed.

"Well now that I am a leader I have my own rules!" he hissed back and smiled at Firestar on his other side.

"What do you think?" he asked, Firestar blushed and batted his eyelashes at Tigerstar.

"HE"S MINE!" Darkstripe screamed smashing through the wall and tackling Firestar, Blackstar grabbed his hunting gun and pointed it at him.

"Get out!" he shouted and Darkstripe ran back to the wall and made another hole instead of taking the one he had already made.

"YOU'RE PAYING FOR THE REPAIRS!" Blackstar shouted after him. Firestar looked shocked, Tigerstar stood over him and stuck out a paw. Firestar blushed and took it.

"Cute!" Blackstar squealed before shoving them outside then paused before saying.

"You guys are enemies right?" he asked, they both nodded but when he closed the door they blushed, Blackstar opened his door again, "you sure?" he asked, they nodded again and padded off to Firestar's car.

"Did he say where we will be going?" Firestar asked Tigerstar, the tom shrugged.

"We can go to Sasha's sushi," he said and parked the car outside the shop.

"Here," Sasha mewed when they reached the counter and gave a box to put the sushi in.

"I CALL ALL THE SHRIMPS!" Tigerstar shouted and took all twenty giant shrimp, Firestar grinned and took all the salmon types.

" _Haha!"_ he laughed and they put their exploding box in front of Sasha. She gulped.

" _$97,"_ she said and Tigerstar took out his piggy bank that somehow fit in his tiny pocket. He poured out around a couple million dollars. He counted out the right amount and handed Sasha a wad.

"Are you guys on a date?" she hissed folding her arms and glaring at Tigerstar.

"Yes," he said and slipped a paw around Firestar. The ginger tom grinned.

"How have you got that much money?" he asked when they left the shop. Tigerstar smiled and patted his pocket.

"I'm the dark forest tax collector, let's just say I haven't delivered yet," he said slyly and opened the passenger side door for Firestar. Tigerstar bounded to his side and the drove off chatting happily. Darkstripe creepily watching from a tree. He leaned forward to see properly and fell to the floor breaking his binoculars.

They returned to Blackstar's. Firestar blushed and Tigerstar smiled.

"Are you sure you're enemies?" Blackstar asked arms crossed his foot tapping.

"No," Tigerstar said and he led Firestar inside. Blackstar turned around to follow but paused and glanced back to see a black tom cat fall out of a tree. Blackstar chuckled and closed the door.


	6. Spiderleg and Daisy

Daisy's nose wrinkled up as soon as her eyes caught Spiderleg's pelt.

"You" she hissed.

"You son of a queen" Spiderleg looked at his paws to avoid her piercing gaze

. "whatever" he muttered like a teenager.

"Do I really have to do this?" Spiderleg turned to face Blackstar

"I can't believe you turn up for a stupid reality show but not to raise your own kits" Daisy began ranting, "typical toms so unreliable"

"It's not my faultI'mm racist and don't want pathetic half breeds for kits"

Blackstar held daisy back as her claws unsheathed.

"Let's get this show on the road" Blackstar cried, Daisy rolled her eyes "I hate both of you!"

A dodgy looking black limo drove up beside them. Spiderleg made his way to the door before daisy shoved him aside, "She-cat's first you uncultured swine"

Although the limo looked big on the outside, on the inside it was tiny and forced the cats to squish together uncomfortably. Spiderleg pressed his back into the corner as far away from his ex as possible. "So" Daisy murmured softly and threatening as the car started.

"This is gonna be fun," Blackstar giggled gazing out the window.

"Why are you coming with us?" Spiderleg asked edging further away from Daisy who was beating her paws together glaring at him.

"Cause," Blackstar mewed and climbed to the front of the car.

"You don't go with any of the other couples," Spiderleg mewed folding his arms.

"So you watch my show?" Blackstar mewed grinning as he flung the driver out the window, a scream followed.

"Yes," Spiderleg said and Daisy rolled her eyes.

"Where are we going?" she asked Blackstar she then screamed. Blackstar had gotten rid of the driver but not replaced him.

"I'm actually here to see if the auto is fixed," he mewed and climbed back to the back seat.

"WHAT?!" Daisy screamed and grabbed the door handle and tried to open it, but it was locked.

"IS IT MEANT TO BE!?" Spiderleg asked pulling at his own door.

"Nope," Blackstar mewed calmly and grinned when the car hit a sign.

"MY LAST MOMENTS ARE GOING TO BE WITH MORONS!" Daisy sobbed and hugged Spiderleg, remembered who it was and shoved him away. "Don't you dare touch me," she hissed shriveling away from him.

"Fine," he hissed and climbed onto Blackstar's other side. There was a loud smash the car jerked before the limo stopped moving. Daisy yanked at the door again it was still locked so she reached over Blackstar and used Spiderleg to smash the window. Daisy climbed out and Blackstar followed. The limo was on fire for some reason and smoke came from the engine.

"That was a successful test run!" Blackstar mewed and glanced at the closet building.

"Vintage sweaters" he read. "Yep we're going there," he said and pulled his two captives into the building for their date.

"I'm gonna go look at the kitten section," he mewed before darting off to grab the last Snowkit sweater.

"Okay," Daisy said and pulled Spiderleg with her to go shop for brown sweaters. She held one up against herself and possed. Spiderlegs cheeks puffed out and he went green he swallowed.

"EWWW!" Daisy mewed and rushed off to find another sweater, she came back with an identical one. She got an identical response from Spiderleg.

"Why don't you go try one," Daisy huffed adding it to her bag. Spiderleg padded off. He shuffled back wearing a turtleneck yellow sweater. "It's adorable!" Daisy mewed and pinched Spiderlegs cheek, she left a mark. Daisy added it her bag.

"It'll look great on Berry weary," she cooed. When the group left the shop the racks were almost empty and the cashier was almost exploding. Blackstar held a stack of sweaters with kittens on them.

"Help me carry these!" Daisy hissed before shoving ten bags into Spiderlegs paws.

"I guess you forgot we're walking," Blackstar laughed fitting his clothes in a backpack. Daisy was silent for a minute before she screamed in fury for a straight two hours, the length of time it took to get home.


	7. Bluestar and Thistleclaw

Bluestar and Thistleclaw were playing chess. They had been set up for another trying to get them to like each other by Snowfur until it was rudely yet welcome interrupted.

"Hello," Blackstar mewed walking into the room straightening a gold chain around his neck with the dollar sign on it.

"Is that real gold?" Thistleclaw asked paw reaching for it.

"Na, just paint," Blackstar laughed and dragged the two outside.

"NO!" Bluestar screamed. "I WAS WINNING!" she shouted pointing at the chess board.

"No you weren't!" snapped Thistleclaw, Blackstar rolled his eyes and shoved them into a dodgy looking limo, the front was smashed in so it looked like it smashed into a brick wall.

"It did," Blackstar mewed grinning and he patted the almost falling off rearview mirror, making it fall off.

"Uh…" Bluestar mewed and wrapped her paws around a no parking sign right next to the limo. "I'm not going in there!" she hissed clinging tightly on the when Thistleclaw also grabbed on she let go a look of disgust crossing her face. "Wash your face," she hissed and stormed into the car. Thistleclaw followed wiping his face with his sleeve jacket as he passed Blackstar his paw slipped into his pocket to retrieve the leader's wallet.

"Okay limo driver take them to the beach," Blackstar mewed turning to leave.

"Wait what is going on?!" Bluestar shouted Blackstar turned back.

"Oh, right I forgot to tell you, I expected you to watch my show!" he hissed paws on hips. "You guys are starring in a date with your enemy!" he mewed and grinned.

"WHAT!?" Bluestar shouted "I can't go on a DATE with my SISTERS cruddy BOYFRIEND no, HUSBAND!" she shouted. Thistleclaw nodded.

"And I can't go on a date with someone as uptight as her!" he mewed folding his paws. Blackstar smiled.

"I'm not uptight!" Bluestar hissed.

"But you guys!" Blackstar mewed, "are stuck in the car!" he added and ran off waving. Bluestar yanked at the door and sighed when it didn't open.

"There is a hole in the window," Thistleclaw mewed and Bluestar gasped.

"I can't go through that! What if a scratch myself!" she hissed and wrapped her paws around her legs and rocked in a ball shape.

"Don't forget your seat belt!" Thistleclaw mewed.

"YOU'RE RIGHT!" Bluestar screamed and yanked at the seat belt, the joint fell off the wall. "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO!" Bluestar screamed again and wheezed "I CAN'T BREATH!" she mewed and snatched up a paper bag and breathed into it.

"I know what we can do," Thistleclaw said rolling his eyes.

"What?" Bluestar asked eagerly leaning close to hear.

"Enjoy the twenty-second drive to the beach," Thistleclaw laughed as the car started and drove out of the park just as a ticket cat marched over pointing at the sign.

"Oh," Bluestar mewed blushing trying to hide that she still wanted a seat belt

"We're here," the limo driver mewed and Thistleclaw grinned climbing out of the window because the door still wouldn't open.

"Make that ten," he mewed and Bluestar sighed. She wearily climbed one leg first through the window as she did, the door hinge slowly fell apart, her body was almost out completely when the door fell off the car and crushed her between it and the hard parking lot floor.

"Ow," she muttered as the limo speed away, being chased by the police because it didn't have a number plate the driver didn't have a license and because there were some illegal drugs in the boot.

"This is going to be nice," Bluestar mewed cracking her spine and stepping onto the beach.

"OW!" she screamed and leaped back onto the grass. "The sand is hot and didn't have time to pack shoes," she grumbled glaring at the hot sun.

"We could go for a swim," Thistleclaw hissed. Padding onto the beach towards the welcoming waves.

"WAIT!" Bluestar screamed and leaped forward tackling him to the floor. "What if there are sharks," she whispered gazing off at the sea. Thistleclaw pushed her away from him and his back to the beach said;

"There are no sharks!" he hissed just as a megalodon leaped from the water. "I thought they were extinct," he muttered and turned back to Bluestar but she was gone, running as far away as possible. "It doesn't have legs!" he shouted after her, she didn't listen. Thistleclaw rolled his eyes and made himself comfortable. Eventually, Bluestar came back out of boredom.

"This sucks," she grumbled and the two sat there in silence. "Wanna do something?" she asked, Thistleclaw nodded.

"Swim," he mewed.

"ARE YOU CRAZY!?" Bluestar shouted, "reason number one why we shouldn't swim: there is a shark in the water, reason two: we don't know how to swim, reason three: we hate swimming!" she hissed.

"Fine," Thistleclaw grumbled. "We can go for a walk," he muttered.

"NO!" Bluestar shouted, "There might be bugs! Or bears!" she hissed. It went on like this for a while. Thistleclaw giving ideas and Bluestar giving reasons why not.

"Well it is too late to do anything now," Thistleclaw hissed looking up at the moon.

"Hello," Blackstar mewed, he ran onto the beach a she-cat running with him, "you guys can go now," he mewed. Bluestar sighed with relief and padded ahead. "OH!" Blackstar said and grabbed Thistleclaw's arm. "I need you tomorrow, you will be in another episode with Spottedleaf," Blackstar said smiling. Thistleclaw gulped.

"Spottedleaf?" he whispered and padded away shivering. Blackstar and his date bounded along the beach for a romantic midnight stroll.

"I love you Russetfur," he mewed.


	8. Cinderpelt and Monster

**This is a rather short chapter but... Oh well, it was meant to be posted a long time ago.**

"Hi and welcome back!" Blackstar mewed, instead of inside he was outside in the rain.

"Can't we go inside?" Cinderpelt asked from behind Blackstar, she shivered.

"No, your date can't fit inside," Blackstar mewed. Cinderpelt frowned. "Oops!" Blackstar chuckled, "I forgot to tell you, you're on a show called A date with your enemy," he added.

"But I don't have any enemies," she whispered shocked someone would hate her.

"What about the guy who gave you that cripple?" Blackstar asked glancing at her twisted leg.

"Ger10?" she asked, Blackstar nodded and looked at the nearby thunderpath.

"That's your queue!" he shouted and a crew cat ran over and whispered something in his ear. "I'll be back," Blackstar mewed and ran off, he returned driving a monster.

"IT'S YOU!" Cinderpelt hissed at it and started pointlessly punching the monster.

"STOP IT!" Blackstar hissed and hopped out of the monster. "You and it will go on a date to Foxleaps fish n chips," he said and pushed Cinderpelt into the car, she drove the car away and to Foxleaps shop.

"Can I take your order?" a teen asked from the counter.

"Hi Icecloud," Cinderpelt said waving and glanced back to see the monster sitting outside.

"Is that?" Icecloud asked shocked, Cinderpelt sighed and nodded.

"Could I have seven scopes of chips and nine pieces of fish," she asked estimating how much food the car would need. It took Foxleap about three seconds to wip it up and Cinderpelt was walking out the door. She sat down and opened the packages.

"NOW NO HOGGING!" she hissed at the monster before digging in she had eaten the whole seven scoops and nine fish before she realized that Ger10 hadn't touched the food.

"What is wrong with you?!" Cinderpelt asked shocked, the monster stayed silent.

"I'll take you to the petrol station," she hissed and hopped/squeezed into the car, her belly giant after the chips.

"What is with them getting fat?" one of the camera cats muttered. Cinderpelt drove to the petrol station and spent a couple 30 minutes trying to talk the counter dude into giving her a cheaper amount of petrol. She padded back outside and got back in the car just as a two-leg ran over shouting.

"MY CAR!" Cinderpelt turned on the car in a rush and drove off at a slow speed.

"Hmhmhm," she muttered calmly as she drove slowly and screamed when a two-leg head appeared through her window, she pushed hard on the gear and speed up. From those outside the car's view, they saw: a two-leg man with his head stuck in a half-shut window being dragged along by the car at top speed, finally his head popped off and Cinderpelt speed away from the body.

"We did great!" she mewed when they were back at Blackstar's and patted Ger10 on the bumper.

"Can I have the keys back?" Blackstar asked his paw out, Cinderpelt hissed.

"NO! WE LOVE EACH OTHER!" and hopped back in the car and drove off, bringing a few mailboxes with her.

 **There you go Empress Nightfrost, sorry I forgot about her :/**


	9. Thistleclaw and Spottedleaf

Thistleclaw sat fidgeting and worried. Blackstar patted the tom on the shoulder.

"I'm sure Spottedleaf doesn't still want to kill you," he soothed but he doubted it after the screaming the she-cat had made over the phone when he told her she would be going on a date with her ex he was sure she would kill him on sight. Thistleclaw didn't seem convinced either.

"Well, when is she getting here?" Blackstar asked Russetfur who was watching Blackstar at work today.

"Now," Spottedleaf hissed storming into the den her heels clacking. She dug her shoe into Thistleclaw's solar plexus.

"I'm dying!" he moaned flopping to the floor which just made him an easier stomping target for Spottedleaf. The pretty cat brought up her foot but Russetfur yanked her back.

"As much as I'd like to see this two-timing jerk's face stomped in, but we need him alive" she mewed. Spottedleaf huffed and sat down. Thistleclaw stay lying on the ground in a ball sobbing.

"Mommy," he whimpered.

"I'm afraid there is no one to save you now," Blackstar sighed yanking the tom onto his seat. "You and fuming here are gonna be going hiking," he said gesturing to Spottedleaf who literally had smoke coming from her ears. Thistleclaw clung to Blackstar's sleeve like a shy toddler would when meeting a cute girl. Except he did so in fear.

"I DON'T WANNA GO!" he whined. Blackstar patted Thistleclaw on the head.

"I'm afraid you have to," he mewed pushing him away. And grinning he said "Today we say goodbye to Thistleclaw!" and shoved the two outside into a limo. Spottedleaf glared at Thistleclaw.

"I'm gonna force you to listen to me gossip," she snarled as the car started.

"So you know Leafpool? Of course, you do, anyway, Firestar has left me to talk to her which gag! Sucks. So Leafpool has been going on about how Crowfeather was cheating on her when they were together! And I asked how she knew this and she said 'Lionblaze and the others were made apprentices in the same moon as Breezepelt cause they were announced at the same gathering, and that makes them a similar age, so close in age actually so he and Nightcloud must have been you know yeah," Spottedleaf said and thrust her hands about in the air almost hitting Thistleclaw in the face, "and I said 'that is horrible proof,' but she being her not Firestar ignored me!" Spottedleaf sighed, "so I left her dream even though had an important prophecy to deliver," she said smoothing he fur angrily grinding her teeth.

"We're here," the limo driver called and Spottedleaf opened the limo door and stepped out. "The doors fixed?" Thistleclaw asked as he climbed out.

"Duh," Spottedleaf hissed rolling her eyes and waving goodbye to the driver. "Let's get hiking," She said and leaped onto Thistleclaw's back. 'Onward!" she shouted and dug her heels into Thistleclaw's ribs like a horse. For the fact, Thistleclaw wanted to live he carried her up a steep hill.

THREE WHOLE HOURS LATER

"Have we reached a break yet?" Thistleclaw asked he was bent over so much all he could see was the floor and trusted Spottedleaf to guide him so he wouldn't hit any trees.

"Nope," Spottedleaf mewed as they passed a seat with a bag of free donuts on it.

"I NEEEEED A BREAK!" he moaned and flopped to the floor.

"Get up you lazy lump!" Spottedleaf hissed hoping off him and kicking the grey tom. He chuckled and grinned up at her.

"Me lazy?" he mewed and pushed himself up. "I think I might have got a nine pack," he said and checked his stomach. "Nope, ten pack!" he sat down on the seat and grabbed a donut. "Gained seven!" he mewed licking the icing off a donut. Spottedleaf frowned.

"You had a three pack?!" she hissed and moved away but her heels got stuck in the mud and she fell into Thistleclaw's lap. "I hate this place," she grunted pulling away from him a donut stuck in her hair. Thistleclaw grinned but stayed silent and watched the seagulls that had been in the air swoop down.

"HELP ME!" Spottedleaf screamed as she got attacked by the birds. She flailed her paws and killed two in one swipe. Thistleclaw's jaw dropped and he leaped to help her. Hey, she would make it out full energy and kill him if he didn't. "

"I hate hikes," she grumbled again once the birds had left. She turned back to the path revealing to Thistleclaw a bald patch in her hair right were the donut had been snatched.

"Don't turn around!" Thistleclaw mewed and Spottedleaf immediately turned around. "Oh never mind it's on your head," Thistleclaw chuckled and Spottedleaf's hand shot to the back of her head.

"NO!" she sobbed "those horrible seagulls!" she shouted and pulled out a notepad, "adding them to my must end up killing list," she muttered, Thistleclaw peeked at the pad and saw Sandstorm's name written over and over. she put the pad away and hopped back onto Thistleclaw's back.

"let's get out of here," she grumbled.


	10. Lionblaze and Breezepelt

Blackstar sauntered on scene flicked his hair back and shot the camera a perfect white smile.

"Hello my lovelies!" he mewed and flicked back his fur. "Now I noticed that someone has asked for me to go on a date with my enemy," he mewed and flicked his tail. "It's not gonna happen!" he hissed padding forward and pointing at the camera with a claw.

"Oh yes it will," the director hissed and dragged him back to his nest. Acornpounce walked back off scene grinning. "I had to," she added. Blackstar grumbled something unheard and grabbed a cat from the side, he pulled the tom on stage and thrust him into the camera accidentally knocking over the stand.

"Oops," he mewed and pulled Lionblaze back to his side. "You're lighter than I'd thought you'd be," Blackstar commented. Lionblaze blushed.

"I…" he mewed and glanced at his paws.

"ANYWAY!" Blackstar shouted, "welcome Breezepelt to the set!" he called and the black tom padded on stage he wore a scowl and was grumbling to himself. "Now you and Liuonblaze will be going on a date," Blackstar mewed wrapping a paw around Breezepelt, he ducked away and jabbed the host in the ribs. "OW!" Blackstar hissed and glared up at Breezepelt. Lionblaze chuckled.

"Whatever," Blackstar grumbled cracking his knuckles. "You two will be going to the park because Nightcloud asked for you not to go anywhere dangerous and according to her, the only safe place is the park," he mewed. Lionblaze laughed but quickly shut up when Breezepelt glared at him.

"Fine," he grumbled and marched out of the den dragging Lionblaze with him. The ginger tom mouthed at Blackstar.

"Help me!" Blackstar grinned and waved goodbye.

"Do you have your own car?" he asked after them. Breezepelt glanced at the floor his cheeks going pink.

"Too dangerous," he grumbled cursing his mother in his mind.

"I do!" Lionblaze shouted happy he had something his cooler half-brother didn't. Lionblaze made for the driver's seat but Breezepelt darted past him and leaped through the open window into the driver's seat. Breezepelt grinned.

"You haven't got the ke…" Liuonblaze mew drowned out when the engine came alive. "YOU PICKPOCKET!" Lionblaze shouted his arms folded.

"Shut up and get in," Breezepelt hissed rolling his eyes. Lionblaze stood at attention saluted and marched to the other side of the car. Breezepelt grinned and he drove right into Blackstar's den wall and blasted through it. Blackstar's angry face appeared in front of them he started screaming his head off at Breezepelt.

"It's my first time driving!" Breezepelt explained but Blackstar didn't care. Before the angry host could punch through the glass and kill him Breezepelt reversed out of the den and quickly drove onto the main street almost crashing into his mother in her car.

"B-Breezepea?" she gulped her face went from pale to red. "YOU GET OUT OF THAT CAR!" she hollered shaking her fist. Breezepelt gulped and drove away again.

"Let me drive!" Lionblaze moaned his face a shade of lime greenBreezepelt sighed and pulled over. Lionblaze sighed with relief as he squirmed through the middle to the driver's seat Breezepelt wriggled through at the same time and they almost got stuck. "To the park, we go!" Lionblaze sang grabbing the steering wheel.

"No," Breezepelt mewed darkly and pointed a water gun at Lionblazes head.

"NO!" Lionblaze squealed putting his paws together to beg. "Anything but water!" he moaned. Breezepelt grinned.

"Good, we robbing a bank," he hissed. Lionblaze gulped and nodded as he shriveled away from the colorful water gun.

"Should we stop them?" one the camera cats whispered from the boot, Breezepelt glared over his seat and lunged forward at the two toms.

"Lionblaze hold the camera I want to film this, I'll tie these two up," the Windclan tom commanded grabbing some rope and ducktape from his pocket.

"Why do you carry those two particular thins around?" Lionblaze frowning but holding the camera.

"Don't ask questions," Breezepelt hissed and wrapped the duck tape around the cats and tied the rope around there mouths.

"Breeze, it's the other way around," Lionblaze whispered but Breezepelt grinned.

"Yes, but they could cut through the rope," he mewed. Lionblaze still frowned.

"They can also do that to the duck tape," he mewed.

"But they won't, it will rip their fur out when they try to get rid of it," Breezepelt cackled and to prove yanked some of the tape off the camera cats. A very loud scream filled the car. Lionblaze nodded and he moved back to the steering wheel.

"The bank we go," he muttered and drove along to the giant black building with a gold dollar sign on it. The kicked through the front doors and marched inside Breezepelt aimed his water gun at a spotted she-cat her hands shot in the air then slowly came back down. A smug look spread across the banker's faces.

"Water won't scare a Riverclan cat!" Leopardstar hiss. Lionblaze glanced around and realized, that yes that was true, all the bankers were Riverclan cats.

"CRUSH THEM!" Breezepelt commanded and flung Lionblaze into the crowd before running towards the safes and vaults. When he returned he carried two large sacks he tossed one to Lionblaze who stood upon a mountain of the unconscious, not dead bodies. As Breezepelt made for the door sirens filled his ears.

"THE FUZZ!" he screamed and he ran out the door followed by Lionblaze. The leaped onto the car quick to drive out of the parking lot before they could leave they almost crashed into the police. Blackstar stepped out of his car a real gun in paw, Bluestar stepped out of the car as well.

"Blackstar?" Breezepelt mewed. The Shadowclan leader nodded.

"I have many jobs," he mewed tucking his paws into his belt and swaying to the music coming from the car.

"You are under arrest," Bluestar hissed pushing in front of the host aiming her gun at the half-brothers. Breezepelt gulped.

"THERE'S FREE KITTENS IN THE PARKING LOT!" Lionblaze shouted and Bluestar ran away paws outstretched Blackstar running after her, and all the other police cats. Lionblaze grinned.

"We're in a parking lot and kittens are basically our annoying children," he chuckled.

"GET DRIVING!" Breezepelt yelled and glanced at the review mirror, he saw the police cats searching under cars and running around. "Never mind! We could actually not go over the speed limit!" he laughed shaking his and grinning. Lionblaze looked hopeful. "But we are," Breezepelt added sternly. Lionblaze sighed and hit down hard on the gare, they heard Bluestar shout;

"They're getting away!" Blackstar shouted back.

"Who cares, keep looking for the kittens!" Lionblaze grinned. They pulled into Blackstar's backyard to end their date, they would never have turned up but to end the date they had to return to where it started and they were driving each other crazy. Blackstar awaited him not wearing his police suit and alone.

"Aren't you gonna arrest us?" Breezepelt asked frowning and folding his paws. Blackstar shook his head.

"You need that money to fix my wall," he explained gesturing from the money bags to the gaping hole in the wall. "And I'm an only one job at time kinda guy, right now I'm your host," he added. Breezepelt sighed with relief and dropped the money bag. He padded out followed by Lionblaze.

"I need my car keys back," he called but Breezepelt was already driving away.


	11. Leafpool and Nightcloud

"BECAUSE OF YOU, MY SON COULD HAVE DIED!" Nightcloud screamed at Blackstar the tom blocked his ears and scrunched up his face in pain.

"Jeez, it wasn't my fault," he complained and sat down. "Plus, he's alive," he added but Nightcloud punched him pathetically. "Ow," Blackstar grumbled rubbing his arm.

"Because of you he is living in Leafpool's car that he stole not in the warm bed I bought for him," she hissed folding her paws and huffing.

"Well like you said, it's Leafpool's car. Actually, Lionblaze's car so it's not my fault," Blackstar explained. Nightcloud nodded.

"I'm calling her," she hissed and pulled out her phone and smacked Leafpool's profile so hard she knocked the phone out of her own hand. The sound of two ringing came up into the air. The first one coming from her phone the other coming from the bathroom. Nightcloud's eyes widened and she stormed over to the door and kicked it down with a powerful hind paw.

"GET OUT!" Leafpool screamed her pants down and sitting on the toilet. Nightcloud gasped and pulled the door back up.

"I'm glad you only punched me," Blackstar laughed, "and I forgot to mention Leafpool's already here," he added. Nightcloud with an expression of shock sat down and shuddered. Blackstar followed a look of curiosity on his face. "Why do you have Leafpool's number?" he asked Nightcloud gazed at him.

"For when I get angry at Crowfeather I want to shout at someone," she mewed and grabbed her phone showing some texts she had sent Leafpool.

"Um," Blackstar glanced away frowning. "LEAFPOOL!" he called, the brown tabby wearily padded into the room from the bathroom toilet paper dragging after her.

"I-I am RUNNING!" she shouted and charged towards the door. Nightcloud leaped after her.

"NO, YOU DON'T" she yowled and grabbed her paws. She dragged the brown tabby over to Blackstar.

"You two are going on a date, car dancing!" he mewed grinning. A look of confusion and Blackstar sighed. "You know when you get in a car and drive really fast in the sand," he said grinning again.

"Were?" Nightcloud asked she had just accepted her fate however Leafpool was still trying to escape.

"In a dessert-ish thing," Blackstar explained dragging Leafpool back and sitting on her.

"There are none of those things around," Nightcloud hissed. Blackstar frowned slightly before he grinned and started rubbing his paws together.

"Well, we will have to do it in my sandpit," he said leading the two outside. In the middle of a depressingly bare and dead back yard sat a box of sand.

"Whaaaa?" Leafpool asked scratching her head and padding closer. Blackstar grinned and pulled to sand trucks from a bucket. He handed one to Nightcloud and the other to Leafpool, they had missing wheels and were moldy in places. Nightcloud dropped it in disgust.

"Mine has bird poo on it," she hissed. Leafpool laughed and placed her truck in the sand.

"What are we meant to do?" she asked Blackstar the tom was already padding off.

"Pretend you're inside the cars!" He shouted as he ran inside and slammed his door.

Nightcloud frowned before she sighed.

"we're not kits anymore," Nightcloud grunted.

"you played these freaking awesome games as a kit?!" Leafpool shouted as she drove (pushed) the car through the sand.

"whoosh Woah ah we're going down," she said crashing her car it went flying. (she flung it out of the sand bin then ran after it.)

She drove the lump of plastic on wheels over to Nightcloud. "race you?" she mewed. Nightcloud rolled her eyes.

"fine," Leafpool hissed turning away.

"wait! Yes," Nightcloud hissed changing her mind and pulling Leafpool back. Engines vroomed, and they speed along skidding across the sand sending it flying.

*classic scene where it seems impressive then change to Blackstar's view watching from the window and you see it for what it really is, two grown mums pretending to be race car drivers. * Blackstar chuckled did he forget to tell them they would be filmed?

"I WIN!" Nightcloud mewed, she had sat on top of Leafpool and pushed her car across the finish line.

"Cheater!" Leafpool screamed and lunged at Nightcloud's car and tore it to shreds.

"MY TRUCK!" Nightcloud sobbed. "YOUR TRUCKS MINE NOW!" she hissed and grabbed the other toy.

"NOOO!" Leafpool sobbed and grabbed a pawful of sand. She flung it into her nemesis's eyes.

"OW!" Nightcloud hissed and grabbed her own paw of sand.

"CUT!" Blackstar shouted running onto the scene and pushed the two apart. "hehe, see you next time," he panted before dragging the two she-cats away by their ears.


	12. Blackstar and enemy

Blackstar padded into the room smoothing out his hair and smoothing out his hair, he shuffled through some cards reading what he was going to say. He flung them aside and sat down.

"welcome back to A date with your enemy!" Blackstar mewed and froze. "give me a sec," he mewed before flinging himself to the floor and collecting up the cards he had thrown aside. He picked it up and smiled.

"today with us we have Jayfeather and-" Acornpounce leaped into the room and pushed Blackstar over mid-sentence.

"today we will be starring Blackstar and his enemy!" she said and yanked Blackstar to his feet.

"what! No!" Blackstar shook his head. "I haven't prepared myself yet!" he groaned. Acornpounce shook her head grinning.

too bad! Now tell us who your enemy is," Acornpounce mewed her hands on her hips. Blackstar nodded hanging his head in sorrow.

"Firestar," he admitted. Acornpounce grinned and pulled her phone out of her pocket and called his number. Sandstorm picked up.

"what do you want?" she groaned.

"is Firestar there?" Acornpounce asked.

"he's having a shower," Sandstorm mewed.

"well get him over to Blackstar's quick smart, throw him if you have to," Acornpounce said before hanging up. A couple of seconds later Firestar was thrown through Blackstar window wearing nothing but a towel. Firestar grinned at Blackstar.

"am I having another date with Tigerstar?" he asked smiling, a little too happy after being grabbed from a shower and chucked across a couple street and through a window.

"no your going with me," Blackstar mewed crossing his paws and pouting. Firestar nodded glumly.

"Okay, but can I get dressed first?" Firestar asked gesturing to his towel. Acornpounce rolled her eyes.

"please! Your cats!" she hissed. Firestar nodded and threw aside his towel and marched outside to Blackstar's car. Blackstar followed slouched over and grumbling.

"stupid show is this how I make everyone feel?" he muttered to himself, he hopped into the driver's seat and groaned.

"you'll be going to a water park!" Acornpounce shouted after them waving from the doorstep. Blackstar groaned again.

"I hate water!" he mewed as he turned on the radio, today's mode was heavy metal. When they reached the water land, it took them another hour to find a park.

"dang these Riverclan cats!" Blackstar hissed gesturing wildly at the cars, they had parked outside the lanes and where to close to for any other car to squeeze in.

"not a thought in mind for anyone else!" Firestar huffed then frowned. "how do you know they're Riverclan?" he asked Blackstar.

"because no other clan would go to a water park. And all the cars a blue," Blackstar explained. Firestar nodded.

"odd," he mewed and hopped out of the car, the had decided to just park in the middle of the parking lot not a thought for anyone else.

Firestar padded through the gate and gazed around at all the pools. "oh!" he shouted and ran towards one well Blackstar paid for entry. "they have sea themed water!" Firestar shouted pointing a pool with dark blue water.

"what? No Firestar that's a che…" Firestar bombed into the water. "FIRESTAR! You mouse brain that's peed in water!" Blackstar yowled and ran to the edge of the pool. Firestar frowned.

"oh" he mewed and climbed out to stand by Blackstar. "want to go on a water slide?" Firestar asked after a moment of silence, Blackstar stared at the two choices a humongous hard water slide that looked scary and boring to climb and a big blow up one.

At the top of the plastic blow up one.

Blackstar leaned forward and stared down the slide to see the faraway bottom.

"you first," he mewed stepping aside for Firestar to pass him, the ginger tom grinned and shook his head. He shoved out a paw and pushed Blackstar down the slide waited a few seconds then jumped after him. The whole way Blackstar screamed.

"IM GETTING PLASTIC BURN!" Blackstar yelped at the very end before dropping off the slide into the pool he sighed as it slightly eased his pain.

"KALABONGJA!" Firestar yowled flying off the slide and landing on top of Blackstar. "the bigger one!" Firestar shouted Blackstar popping up from beneath him.

"noooo…" the tom groaned as Firestar pulled him into the queue, it was only a two cat wait because everyone else was too scared or couldn't be bothered climbing the stairs to the top. Blackstar panted and whimpered the whole way up but Firestar pranced up quite delighted to climb what felt like hundreds of flights of stairs. Finally, at the top Firestar slid down the slide without hesitation. Blackstar gulped, there was no-one behind him so he couldn't wait long and he couldn't back out. He was on clan tv and was not going to act like a sissy. He checked his watch and grinned.

"Oh, would you look at that the dates over!" He sighed relief and turned to walk back down the stairs, but the camera cats blocked his way they pushed him down the slide and laughed as he squealed.


	13. Jayfeather and Breezepelt

Blackstar sighed he sat down in a chair and winced.

"it still burns!" he moaned memories of his date last episode filling his brain. "anyway!" he hissed shaking his head. "today we have Jayfeather and his enemy!" he said brightly and winced again. Jayfeather walked on stage glaring around.

"your room is very out of fashion," Jayfeather commented and sat down. Blackstar rolled his eyes.

"yeah, yeah, you can't even see it. anyway, who is your worst enemy?" he asked pocking Jayfeather in the check, the blind medicine cat pushed the paw away.

"I don't waste my time figuring out who I hate most," he mewed. A black blur shot it to the room.

"yes, you do! It's me!" Breezepelt hissed shaking his half-brother by the shoulder. "I'm your worst enemy!"

"of course," Jayfeather mewed, "I forgot," he hissed rolling his eyes. Blackstar nodded.

"anyway, BREEZEPELT! You were meant to come out when I told you to!" the host hissed clenching his teeth. Breezepelt shrugged.

"come on," he said dragging Jayfeather out of the den by the scruff.

"my car," Jayfeather hissed pulling free and walking over to his car.

"no, we'll take mine!" Breezepelt hissed strutting over to his car he heard a vroom and spun back around to see Jayfeather pulling out of the driveway. "wait for me!" Breezepelt yowled bounding over.

"Well, it looks like we're taking my car! And yours is actually my brother's car," Jayfeather mewed opening the passenger seat door so Breezepelt could get in.

"whatever," Breezepelt grumbled folding his arms waiting for Jayfeather to go into gear. The medicine cat rolled his eyes and leaned over and reached across Breezepelt lap and plugged his seat belt on. Breezepelt rolled his eyes back and huffed.

"where are we going," Jayfeather asked. Breezepelt who had been handed some brochures. The Windclan tom chucked them out the window. "oi!" Jayfeather yowled spun around and drove right back to the spot the had been flung. "get out and pick them up!" Jayfeather hissed. Breezepelt curled his lip.

"no," he snarled. Jayfeather's eyes went to slit and he unbuckled the seat belts and kicked Breezepelt out of the car finally after while they were back on the road there was a lot of silence then finally Breezepelt screamed.

"YOU'RE FREACKING BLIND! WHY AM I LETTING YOU DRIVE, HOW ARE YOU DRIVING!" the tom yowled clawing at his seat belt trying to escape.

"wondered how long it would be until you remembered brother!" Jayfeather sneered the brother part. Breezepelt managed to whine down the window, he seemed to be trying to jump out of it.

"I'm stuck!" Breezepelt mewed his head stuck out the windows his shoulders not managing to squeeze through.

"it would have been easier to open the door," Jayfeather mewed pulling over again.

Back on the road.

Jayfeather had moved Breezepelt to the back where the windows had kiddie locks and he had locked the doors.

"so, where are we going," Jayfeather asked again. Breezepelt pulled a water gun from his pocket.

"robbing a very historical museum," he mewed. Jayfeather shrugged.

"Nope," he mewed drawing his own real gun. Breezepelt screamed and scrambled into the boot. "how? He can't see," he whispered to himself wondering how everything his half brother was doing be possible. Jayfeather smiled.

"we shall go to McDonald's," Jayfeather mewed pulling into a parking lot. "even though I hate this place," he added. Breezepelt climbed out of the car, as he padded around, he noticed a long white cane coming from the front of Jayfeather's car.

"how is that possible," Breezepelt groaned.

"it shouldn't be" Jayfeather replied padding over to the door he walked into McDonald's took their order and sat down at a table. Breezepelt shoved his chips down his throat a minute later Breezepelt moaned.

"can't breathe," he groaned jabbing between his ribs.

"it's what happens when you eat bread or chips to fast," Jayfeather explained wiping his face with a napkin and standing up. "I think we're done here," Jayfeather mewed to the camera cats and padded out of the shop Breezepelt moaning after him.

"and cut!" Acornpounce yowled.


	14. Leafpool and Nightcloud and Feathertail

Blackstar smoothed out his fur and sat back on a cozy couch. Nightcloud sat beside him.

"what am I doing here again?" she hissed her tail lashing from side to side.

"well same as last time I guess, who is your enemy?" Blackstar asked. Nightcloud glared at the host her left eye twitching.

"Leafpool and you know it!" the black she-cat hissed," Blackstar nodded.

"this is true, but surely you hate Feathertail as well?!" he mewed grinning when Nightcloud didn't reply he clapped his hands together and to cats grudgingly padded on set.

"YOU TWO!" Nightcloud hissed clenching her paws into fists. "I have to deal with both of them at the same time?" she asked shaking Blackstar by the shoulders.

"more like they have to deal with you," Blackstar winced pulling away from the she-cat. "anyway! You three will be going on a small dinner in the dreaded, Purdy's perfect piece of pigeon," Leafpool groaned.

"that place is full of kits," she hissed. Nightcloud growled.

"kits are beautiful but a guess someone like you won't care!" she mewed referring to her giving up her kits.

"I didn't even have the time to have kits with Crowpaw!" Feathertail piped up glaring at Leafpool. Both Nightcloud and her turning on Leafpool.

"Sorry!" she hissed scrambling away. Blackstar rolled his eyes.

"okay you guys can go now but make sure when you come back there is still three of you," he hissed pushing them into the dodgy limo awaiting them.

"Of course," Nightcloud mewed. As soon as Blackstar closed the door both Feathertail and her sniggered glaring at Leafpool. The door flung open again and Blackstar rushed over to car putting some shades on.

"sorry but I don't trust you," he said slipping into the driver's seat.

"great," Nightcloud groaned slouching against the window. Feathertail smiled weakly and tried to clean her claws. Leafpool was scratching at the windows trying to spell out help me. But to everyone outside the limo who were her target could just read, em pleh and were to dumb to figure out what it meant, plus the car was moving to fast for any cat to read. Blackstar smiled as he wound down the window, at least tried to.

"Oh! That's another thing to add to the needs replacing on the car list," Blackstar called and handed a rolled up piece of paper. "add it for me?" he asked passing it to Nightcloud, it took the black she-cat a whole minute to unroll it and when she went to write they went across a couple hundred bumps causing her pen to scribble across the paper instead of write, somehow she crossed through every word.

"you'll have to rewrite the whole thing, that is way to hard to read!" Blackstar warned, he had been watching the whole time. Nightcloud's right eye twitched and Feathertail had to hold her back so she wouldn't rip out one of Blackstar's eyeballs and eat it in front of the other to inflict mental damage.

At Purdy's perfect piece of pigeon.

Nightcloud sat down at heir table holding the still not finished scroll of paper. She scribbled angrily every job that needs to be done on the sad excuse of a limo. Feathertail picked up her menu and muttered aloud. "Pigeon stew, Pigeon undercooked, pigeon rare, pigeon steamed, pigeon burnt," the other two could barely hear her over the screams of the kits around them. Leafpool moaned and blocked her ears.

"I'll have pigeon roasted," she mewed glaring down at her own menu.

"I'll have Pigeon burnt," Nightcloud muttered to busy writing to think of what she was saying. Feathertail and Leafpool shrugged.

"any drinks," Nightcloud asked glancing up for the first time reviling her crusty dried lips. Leafpool gasped.

"you just need water hon!" she warned.

"there is non," Feathertail told them, "everything here is pigeon," she told them. "pigeon blood, crushed pigeon brains, pigeon tears," she read out from the menu. Nightcloud gasped.

"I didn't bring a bottle!" she sobbed.

"I did," Leafpool sneered holding up a bottle and shook it. The slushing made Nightcloud sob harder. Nightcloud snatched the bottle and glugged it down. Leafpool rolled her eyes.

"you're welcome," she hissed folding her paws as a waiter approached them.

"are you ready to order?" he asked. Feathertail nodded.

"2 pigeons roasted and a pigeon burnt," Feathertail said smiling.

"feathertail wants hers burnt?" Nightcloud asked leaning into Leafpool to whisper. Leafpool bit her lip and wondered if she should tell her that was what she had ordered.

"any drinks?" the waiter asked politely.

"No!" the all hissed. The waiter jumped and scuttled off. Nightcloud groaned and turned back to her scroll.

"why.." she moaned scribbling down all the jobs.

"you could just write down buy a new car," Feathertail mewed checking her face on a spoon. Nightcloud grinned and scribbled all over everything she had done at the bottom she wrote 'buy a new car' Nightcloud Feathertail and Leafpool.

"my two favorite she-cats, and my least favorite," someone mewed, the three she-cats turned to see Crowfeather standing holding their meals. He placed the burnt lump of coal in front of Nightcloud.

"looks just like you," he mewed. Leafpool laughed.

"you're so funny," she mewed lightly punching him in the shoulder.

"it has your bitterness,' she snarled taking a bite of her meal then spitting it out right In Crowfeather's face. Feathertail grinned and high fived with Nightcloud. Crowfeather huffed and stormed away.

"make that my one favorite she-cat!" he shouted shrilling storming into the kitchen.

"I didn't know he worked here," Feathertail mewed staring after him. Leafpool smiled.

"I'm his favorite," she mewed. Nightcloud snorted and turned to Feathertail.

"what have you got against him?" she asked pushing her plate away and stealing some of Leafpool's pigeon.

"oh you know," Feathertail sighed. "I would be happy for him to get over me and find love again, but he didn't even have time to grieve over me before he started dating Leafpool!" she growled glaring at Leafpool.

"can you guys hurry up?!" they heard Blackstar yell from the car. Leafpool rolled her eyes and shoved the last of a pigeon in her mouth. They paid and left the building. Blackstar grinned at them and pushed open the doors. They climbed in and Blackstar grinned harder.

"so my scroll?" he asked, Nightcloud passed it over and Blackstar quickly scanned over it.

"Nope, I will never get rid of my baby, I will just replace everything that doesn't work anymore, which is everything but the starring wheel," Blackstar mewed patting the wheel, it broke in two. "hehe, anyway your homework is to write that properly, you have to be done by your next date," he told Nightcloud who groaned,

"I have to go on another date?!" she hissed. Blackstar nodded. "it better not be next episode, I need a break!" she hissed rubbing her head.

"no next episode is Halfmoon and stick!" he said to the camera. "so until then we're done here," he mewed and the film stopped.


	15. Halfmoon and stick

**I am sorry I haven't updated in so long! I was stuck on this chapter wondering what to write. But I finally completed it. Please review, fav, follow and that. I hope you enjoy! if you read this I would also love it if you vote on my poll.**

Blackstar was smiling at Stick, it sat on a cushion silent. "who is your enemy?" he asked then grinned at the camera. "I feel so stupid!" he chuckled. Stick never answered.

"do we need to get Jayfeather?" the camera cat asked. Blackstar nodded. A while later a grey tabby padded up to stick.

"Hi babe," Jayfeather mewed kissing stick on the… cheek? "so, what do you want?" Jayfeather asked Blackstar. "I mean stick diffidently isn't my enemy," he hissed. Blackstar smirked.

"this is its episode," Blackstar mewed. Jayfeather glared at the white and black tom with his sightless eyes.

"it? Stick is not it! She is a she-stick," he hissed pocking Blackstar hard in the cheek. Blackstar nodded.

"Yeah, yeah so we need you to translate her for us," Blackstar hissed rolling his eyes.

"she says her enemy is Halfmoon," Jayfeather almost instantly mewed. Blackstar nodded and pulled down a curtain to reveal Halfmoon. She padded up to Jayfeather smiling. Jayfeather shook his head and she pouted.

"anyway, can I go now!' Jayfeather asked, "I have a tv show that I need to be planning," he added.

"Oh yes, I understand you may go!" Blackstar mewed nodding and pushed Jayfeather out of his den. He shut the door and spun to grin at Halfmoon and Stick. Halfmoon was about to snap Stick. "NO!" Blackstar hissed snatching stick. "If Jayfeather finds out that stick breaks again on my watch he will kill me," Blackstar hissed, "but before he does, I'll kill you," he added. Halfmoon twisted her mouth and sighed.

"whatever," she grumbled crossing her paws. Blackstar nodded.

"well, you and stick are going on a date to… oh, a mud run!" Blackstar mewed as a brochure blew through the window. The cats on the front looked really unhappy and surprise, surprise, the tribe owned it. Halfmoon shrugged.

"I'm sure Stick will be fine with this," Halfmoon grunted.

"cool," Blackstar hissed and led them to the dodgy limo. Placing Stick onto the furthest seat she followed and Blackstar slammed the door on her tail. She gulped in pain and her eyes watered.

"be warned, this a three-day long journey! And I hate talking to people." The driver told Halfmoon than he put up the separating screen. Halfmoon glanced at Stick.

"I guess that make's you my only company!" she chuckled sadly.

First day:

Halfmoon tried to maintain sanity but she ended up talking to stick within the first hours. It was more complaining about how Jayfeather wouldn't choose between them and things like that.

The second day:

She got so bored she attempted to play games with Stick. And took selfies to. This day was also the day a motorcycle with Firestar and Spottedleaf on it. Took off the part of her tail that was still stuck outside of the car.

Day three: the morning was spent eating soggy gross cereal. She actually attempted to spoon feed stick. She ended up spilling the cereal on the seat and this made the driver really angry.

The car pulled up outside a deep and long ditch filled with mud.

"is this! What we traveled for?!" Halfmoon hissed when she hopped out of the car stick in her paw.

"Yes, now I will pick you up later!" the driver hissed than drove off. Halfmoon groaned. She padded up to a tiny both with an old cat in it. As she got closer she realized that the old cat was chained to the spot.

"Hello, where are your tickets?" the old cat grunted sticking out one chained paw. Halfmoon placed the one ticket in her paw and carried stick over to the ditch joining a small line of tribe cats.

"this is so awesome! I love mud runs!"

"me too!" the tribe cats chattered happily waiting for the buzz to go for them to run into the ditch.

"this is so disgusting," Halfmoon grunted plugging her nose.

"guys," A tribe cat mewed to another staring at Halfmoon. "it's Halfmoon!" he gasped. The tribe cats swarmed forward towards the tribe celebrity just as the buzzer rang out.

"RUN!" Halfmoon hissed to stick and charged into the mud to escape the paparazzi. But it didn't matter. The tribe liked mud better and they stopped chasing her. The pushed and pulled trying to get to the front. Halfmoon struggled to lift her paw every step. Suddenly a cat behind her had a burst of energy and stepped on her tail. Her hind legs were whipped out from beneath her and she dropped into the mud. She got run over by the next five tribe cats. Finally, she emerged from the mud. She would get her revenge. She was so soaked she was twice her usual size, couldn't see and worst of all had mud in her mouth. She grunted and heaved and pulled herself out of the ditch. As she did the manager grabbed a hose and started hosing those out of the ditch down.

"MUST GET THERE! MUST RINSE OFF!" Halfmoon screamed and stood on her hind legs and clambered over to the hose.

"BEAR!" A tribe cats screamed when he spotted her.

"NO! mud monster!" another screamed and the all charged away still covered in mud. The manager rolled his eyes and pointed his hose at Halfmoon and soaked her down slowly her pelt became visible.

"thank you I am leaving and never returning!" Halfmoon hissed and padded away trying to remain. The limo awaited her in the park she hopped in and somehow the journey only to three minutes back.

She stepped back out of the car and stood on Blackstar's lawn. Jayfeather awaited her holding a giant sign reading.

"welcome home stick," as soon as she read the words she froze. She quickly glanced around and gulped. She smiled weakly than turn and ran. She didn't even make it to the road before Jayfeather leaped on top of her.

"Where Is she?!" he hissed.

"I left Stick in the mud run!" Halfmoon admitted weakly. Wincing.

"SOMEONE MUST PAY!" Jayfeather screamed turning into destroy mode. Later on, Halfmoon found herself in the mud pit again feeling around for Stick.


End file.
